The Journey of Awakening (2): The Wrong Path of Life

  • Author: 若愚
  • Translator:里奇
  • Proofreader: Jenny Ball

The truth can never be hidden! The truth being covered up will eventually result in a disaster of its coverers. We’ve seen the price paid by the Chinese Communist Party as it tried to cover up the truth of Wuhan and Hong Kong. This is one of the ways to terminate the CCP by itself. Let the CCP lie vigorously, and finally use its lies to expose its lies; use its spear to pierce its shield! The whistleblower movement requires wisdom, courage, perseverance, selflessness and heavenly opportunity! We need God’s bestow. — Guo Wengui’s “Wengui Live on the Spring Festival Gala”, January 24, 2020

Essentially you need to break the limitations, the habits and inertia of traditional thinking to achieve self-transcendence. Going beyond the certain height means exceeding one’s limited courage, superficial wisdom, limited cognition and restrained character. Only when you’ve gained more abilities, higher wisdom, deeper cognition, and better character,  can you successfully achieve self-transcendence.

In essence, I have always regarded myself as a typical traditional scholar, so my behavior and conduct must be strictly in accordance with the standard norms of scholars. It is the highest realm as golden rules for scholars that “scholars will never interfere in politics”.

Now I think that this is not only the norm a standard scholar abides, but also the shackles for him: If I were to hold this principle tightly, it’s tantamount to drawing the boundary of my own prison and imprisoning my mind. While claiming never to interfere in politics, as a matter of fact, concerning about politics no less than others.

Take Chen Yinke , a well-known academic predecessor, as an example. His motto was that “It doesn’t matter whoever runs the government , as long as I can continue to study the antiquities” (Xian Yuqing said). It was very typical of this kind.

As early as the time when he talked about the death of Wang Guowei, he said that “it is not the grievances of one person, but the rise or fall of a family”. He just wanted to be an independent scholar and conduct his own independent academic research, and he would not be constrained to by the grievances of a party, the rise or fall of a government.” However, Mr. Chen Yinke had never escaped from politics discussion in name of academics, and it was impossible for him to escape from the political turmoil of his era. The relation between politics and people is like that of air and human, or water and fish, and they cannot be separated from each other.

When I was much younger,  this highest principle used to engraved in my heart and be carried out to the word. I never intervened politics, never participated in politics, never got involved in politics, and I only read my books as saint. But once rosy ideals fall apart in reality, they are almost as easy to burst as soap bubbles.

During my college time there were various policies to credit bonuses for the CCP party members or cadres as priority. It was nearly impossible to apply for scholarship or to apply for a job after graduation or to further study abroad if you were neither a CCP member nor outstanding academically. It’s basically like a mission impossible.

After getting a job, I thought I was finally free and could control my own destiny. It didn’t take long before I realized that it was not that simple at all. The secretary of the Party branch in my company came and talked to me every other two or three days, trying every effort to persuade me to join the Party! He told me if I became a Party member, my loyalty would be in verified and I’d be qualified to get promotions. As the saying goes “a soldier who does not want to be a general is not a good soldier”.

Everyone does long for success in life. It seemed that I had no other choice but to move forward. So unknowingly I surrendered and submitted the application for joining the party. As per the procedure I got to attend the mandatory classes to learn what CCP was and then passed the period of scrutiny and inspection by the Party. Just one last step to make a vow I would be a member, then an old chairman of the democratic party came to the door and asked me if I’d like to join his party.

When I recall that today, I would perceive it as God’s will! I had learnt a little in the school classes for political study and had some knowledge of the democratic party as well as several democratic parties under the CCP political system. What attracted me most was those outstanding people of the democratic parties in history, such as Zhang Lan, Ma Yinchu, Ma Xulun, and Wen Yiduo, etc. I admired their academic status and achievements sincerely. Due to their historical contributions and achievement, I have a good impression of the term “Democratic Parties”. After consideration, years of brainwashing education of the Communist Party I received since childhood immediately surrendered completely to my intuition. I made a 180-degree turn at the doorstep of CCP, and successfully put aside such a “stain” that nearly had my life contaminated.

The subsequent development fully proved how “wise” my choice was. For all Chinese people, joining the party, on one hand, means gained the qualification to get promoted and able to make money, but on the other hand it means putting on the curse of losing freedom. No matter how great a hero would be and how powerful elites to be, once they joined this underworld gang, they would immediately act as morons, completely lose the ability to think independently and make decision  independently, and thus completely become the party’s zombies and hatchet man.

It was my life motto that helped me to make such a critical choice among divergent paths of life: I choose and do everything for my heart, not after fame or fortune. As the saying goes, “The three realms can’t be seen in the eyes of dust, while sky is endless when one is selfless.” Keep asking yourself:“Do I feel at ease doing this? Is there anything uneasy in my heart? ” If the answer is no, just do it and never look back.

Time will tell everything! It is equally impartial to everyone. Many years after my graduation from universities, those who I shared great deal of time together on academic and leisure life, now it’s hard to have some common topics to talk with except festival greetings. The seniors  who once offered me a lot of guidance and helpful suggestions would remain silent or change topics whenever critical and “sensitive” issues mentioned.

Even couples who have been living together for years and helped each other a lot both in career and life, have to drop the topic when reaching some hot issues. Just like a race on the track for athletes, as long as you keep advancing in the same direction, no matter how long it takes, you will see the gaps between. If you can’t see the other party, it may not mean you have run too fast, but because the other Party does not move forward, or even moved towards the opposite direction. And this makes you so unique and outstanding.

It requires calmness, wisdom, and ability of making choice to find the right direction. It is not realistic to expect everyone around us sharing the same attitude and interests as us. Therefore, you must be responsible for the choice and bear the consequences. To reach  conclusions and decisions that can withstand the history and time, a firm belief in truth is the fundamental requirement.  

Imagine that under a high-pressure system, or under the temptation of fame and fortune, a person would involuntarily say things against his will or do things against his nature. But he would always try to get rid of this environment and circumstances to return one’s true self. So long as you remain conscience, you would always feel contentment and peace for what you say or do. Stay alone in a dark room, open your mind and ask yourself if there is any trace of soul being tortured and restlessness. Rather than wearing a mask every day to deceive yourself and acting as an actor, nothing better than to be truly yourself and let your soul intuition to judge. You soul need the strongest and safest harbor so to survive the most severe harm, so to self-cure and reconstruct.

Of course, the democratic parties that exist as the decoration of Vase Party did not bring me any unusual or special development. But undeniably it provided me with a relatively relaxed environment, which gave me the opportunity to really pay attention to and study the various problems of our national political system. Thus it completely broke the previous curse set by myself:  “not interfere in politics.” If made me  truly explore and understand the problems once were unthinkable to solve in  the divergent paths of life. I had to say, it was absolutely impossible in the atmosphere of CCP regime.

In 2009, with the vigorous development of the Internet in China and the rapid rise of various Weibo platforms, a brand-new political atmosphere emerged into the stage of history, and I got interested in politics online and thus gained a whole new perspective. I believe that many awakened people are like me growing up in that period under the influence of heavy political atmosphere.

A critical choice changed the track of my life, and an accidental online encounter opened a window for me to observe the unknown world.

Later, an online friend named “X Li” sent me a collection of essays called “Wei Bin Wei Lan” compilation, Li told me that I could download on mobile phone and read it to kill time. Later, by exchanging opinions, I knew that he had expected that I could read the spiritual thoughts of these essays seriously, which seemed be helpful to see through many problems in China and to improve my character and sentiment.

“If you think these articles are good, you can also forward them to more people no matter you know them or not.” He said, “It will be great if more people read them because it is good for China.  Patriotism means to free the people from ideological shackles.” Through the enlightenment of Whistleblower Movement, I later learned that these articles are mostly tools for propaganda,  as a variant of the seventh floor of the “Nine-Layered Demon Tower” from abroad for domestic readers. This “seamless” giant net has really broken the limit that any ordinary person can imagine. Well-known authors such as Gong Xiaoxia, He Qinglian, Chen Pokong, Guo Guoting, Teng Biao, Wei Jingsheng, He Pin, Jiang Weiping, Henghe and even Boxun, the New York Times, Voice of America, Voice of Germany and other so-called free media, their veils have been uncovered. Their true nature of evil and ugly appearance has been exposed during the course of four years of Whistleblower Movement.

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