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New Zealand’s Trade Minister Damien O’Connor suggested in January that close ally Australia should “show more respect” to Beijing if it wished to copy the “mature” relationship between New Zealand and the CCP.
These are interesting ideas. What they demonstrate to the detached amateur psycho-analyst (me) is that the exact opposite of the intended meaning is true. It reminds this writer of the terms ‘crazy-talk’, ‘crazy-making’ which were coined by psychologists and analysts examining the breakdown of marriages.
The emotional abuse that occurs in a relationship with a narcissist is merciless and relentless. Narcissists brainwash their victims. They use several different methods of coercion in order to obtain control over their partner. They threaten, degrade, shift blame, criticize, manipulate, verbally assault, dominate, blackmail, withdraw, withhold love and affection and “gaslight” their victims.
The CCP has perfected these strategies, and uses them relentlessly and successfully in their relations with other nations. Regretfully, I must inform the New Zealand government that they are a victim of the CCP’s crazy-talk or gas-lighting diplomacy. New Zealand’s government has declared that it prefers not to align with the Five-Eyes nations (US, UK, Australia, Canada, and New Zealand) on issues other than intelligence-sharing. “We are uncomfortable with expanding the remit of the Five Eyes” , foreign minister Nanaia Mahuta told reporters. “We would much rather prefer to look for multilateral opportunities to express our interests ”. This marks a departure from the policy of former deputy Prime Minister Winston Peters who was consistently critical of Beijing’s bellicosity and foreign interference.
This is sure to please the CCP as it will act as a brake on the expansion of the alliance that is the Five Eyes. In fact, it is likely dictated by the CCP, through coercive means related to the China-New Zealand trade relationship. New Zealand opted out of criticizing the World Health Organization’s (WHO) investigation into COVID-19, despite WHO Director-General Tedros Ghebreyesus admitting information was withheld from investigators. In other words, the current government is persuaded, by self-interest and by the traditional assuaging words and crazy-talk of the CCP, to not stand up for International principles, even when it concerns life-and-death issues like the CCP developing and spreading the CCP-virus.
Put quite simply, crazy-talk, or gaslighting, is a form of brainwashing. The narcissist denies that events ever occurred or certain things were said. This is exactly like the CCP which is busy trying to persuade the world that the they had nothing to do with CCP-virus pandemic and, on the contrary, the virus emerged, from a yet to be determined animal, in record time, ready to spread rapidly between humans, and kill them at an unheard-of rate. The narcissist can also go to the opposite extreme and make up events that never occurred or conversations that were never had. This causes the victim to doubt what they’re hearing and seeing to the point that they begin to question their sanity.
When this technique is first used on someone, initially they know better. However, over time, the victim begins to believe the gas-lighter. They start to believe they are imagining things, have some kind of mental illness or faulty memory. The CCP has succeeded with this strategy for 70 years. When you doubt your perception of reality, the gas-lighter is able to control you because you become dependent on the gas-lighter for the truth.
Another common tactic of a narcissist is to project their own issues onto their victim. This is an attempt to hide any actions or truths they do not want brought to light about themselves. It is their hope that by projecting issues of their own onto you it will distract you from their malignant behavior.
How often has the CCP done this? Projecting criticism of their treatment of Hong Kong-ers, Taiwanese, Uyghurs, Tibetans, Falun Gong, Christians, and South-China Sea neighbors back onto them or onto the US by criticizing, for example, racial unrest in America, which they helped to stir up.
A narcissist wants you to believe you have problems and issues only he can understand and only he is willing to tolerate. By doing this, he believes you will begin to feel unlovable in some strange paranoid way and never leave him out of fear of rejection in the future.
This is the exact strategy that the CCP uses on the Chinese people by trying to convince them from primary school that the party loves them more than their own mother and father. The ultimate form of gaslighting. The CCP is also using this strategy to convince smaller nations in Africa, South and Central America, in particular, that all their problems are caused by white people in the west, and that the only way for them to prosper is to join the CCP in eradicating the white race.
The perfect narcissist “infiltrates his victim’s defenses, shatters her self-confidence, confuses and confounds her, demeans and debases her. He invades her territory, abuses her confidence, exhausts her resources, hurts her loved ones, threatens her stability and security, involves her in his paranoid states of mind, frightens her out of her wits, withholds love and sex from her, prevents satisfaction and causes frustration, humiliates and insults her privately and in public, points out her shortcomings, criticizes her profusely and in a scientific and objective. So subtle and poisonous is the narcissistic variant of sadism that it might well be regarded as the most dangerous of all.” 
Gaslighting is incredibly cruel, yet very subtle. It is very difficult to see when you’re in the midst of a relationship with a narcissist. That is why it’s so important to establish NO CONTACT and distance yourself from your abuser – in this case the CCP. When you’re able to put space between yourself and the narcissist, you begin to see how abusive they really are. It takes time, but eventually by maintaining NO CONTACT you will deprogram from them.
New Zealand has long been accused of being the “soft underbelly” of the Five Eyes’ network, with critics panning the Ardern government for avoiding offending Beijing to maintain its trade relationship. Damien O’Connor believes that if only “they (Australia) were to follow us and show respect, and I guess show a little more diplomacy from time to time, and be cautious with wording then, they too, hopefully, would be in a similar situation (to New Zealand).” 
These words reflect more than just colossal naivete, but also the classic signs of the cruel and abusive gaslighting relationship which the CCP fosters with its victims. The brainwashing is mixed with threats. The victim is unable to see the symptoms in themselves. O’Connor even projects his country’s own naive-gaslight disease onto Australia. The symptoms are strong in this victim.
The only solution is to completely de-couple, to break off the relationship. Unfortunately, New Zealand has been completely deceived, infiltrated and the relationship with the CCP now resembles Stockholm Syndrome.
 “New Zealand uncomfortable with expanding five eyes to confront China: NZ foreign minister”, Daniel Teng, The Epoch Times, April 19, 2021.
 “Malignant self-love, narcissism revisited”, Sam Vaknin